MAILBAG

MAILBAG: “am i a vampire?”

DARTHADAM10 writes:

I am very pale and have sharp teeth but I am not affected by garlic but i do act like a vampire and my pals call me the class vampire am i a vampire?

No, you are not a vampire. Judging solely by the data provided, you are a next-gen super-nosferatu. How else to explain your extraordinary defenses against garlic? If there are others like you, I pray that your numbers are few, super-nosferatu.

08-03-2009 11:42 am by Joshua Gee

COMMENTS (875)

875 Responses to “MAILBAG: “am i a vampire?””

    1 2 3 ... 88
  1. Zombified Vampiric Alien Werewolf From Your worst Nightmare, On October 26th, 2011 at 3:55 pm Said:

    I wish I was a Vampire, It would be a great excuse not to go to school, sleeping during the day.

  2. Creeps lover, On December 3rd, 2010 at 8:52 pm Said:

    I thought The Runaways movie was weird and just a kind of jumble. I could barely catch what was going on.
    And what was that about Kristen Stewart doing drugs or something? Wasn’t she in Zathura?

  3. Evelyn Reed, On December 2nd, 2010 at 1:37 pm Said:

    the most memorable movie quote that i could think of is the one on Forest Gump ;”*

  4. Freakazoid, On October 12th, 2010 at 12:32 am Said:

    I’m not saying she did awesome, but pretty decent. Joan Jett heard a cover of her songs sang by Kristin and thought it was herself.

  5. DJ Loomis, On October 11th, 2010 at 8:50 pm Said:

    What? I thought Michael Shannon (who played Kim Fowley) was by far the best, he was perfect as a manipulative asshole.

  6. Freakazoid, On October 11th, 2010 at 7:36 pm Said:

    Actually DJ, she did pretty decent as Joan Jett. Hell, my current girlfriend liked her as Joan Jett and she hates Kristin Stewart.

  7. Diann Fieldman, On October 11th, 2010 at 10:00 am Said:

    New! Listing on Music by davidewood: Twitter account of David Wood. Producer and multi-instumentalist from Cana th..

  8. Hayden Stec, On October 10th, 2010 at 8:57 pm Said:

    Dear Mr.Gee,
    I am wondering how you got all this information for
    Encyclopedia Horrifica

  9. DJ Loomis, On August 15th, 2010 at 3:11 pm Said:

    She was terrible in the Runaways, too. Who the hell thought she would make a good Joan Jett?

  10. Freakazoid, On August 15th, 2010 at 12:38 am Said:

    Also, she was caught smoking weed before and is far beyond intelligent.

    11. 1 2 3 ... 88

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